Secrets For A Happier Life May 8, 2017

Secrets For A Happier Life: Ideas, Inspiration & Practices

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Build your well of happiness


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Michael D Selzer DDS


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August 18 2016

NOW for Happiness 


Cross over to sunny side
May 8, 2017
 Dear Michael,   
“Grab your coat and grab your hat, 
leave your worries on the door step
Just direct your feet to the sunny side of the street
I used to walk in the shade with the blues on parade
No longer afraid, the rover crossed over”
“On the Sunny Side of the Street” is a 1930 song, with credited music composed by Jimmy McHugh and lyrics by Dorothy Fields.
Having become a jazz standard, it was played by such greats as Louis Armstrong, Ted Lewis, Dave BrubeckEarl Hines, Benny Goodman, Lionel Hampton, Erroll Garner, Dizzy Gillespie, Art Tatum, James Booker, Count Basie and Lester Young.
On the sunny side of the street goes back many years and its classic message is still popular today.  What is the sunny side of the street and how do we get there?  
I invite you to keep reading below:
Michael Selzer DDS

Free Gift        Happiness Deja Vu

Happiness Deja Vu is a web app page (no download).
Enjoy many happy moments captured in original photos each intertwined with a contemplation on happiness.
Impossible to view and not become happier.
Includes 12 exercises for happiness


Small Moments Of Happiness
My journey and exploration into happiness started over 25 years ago.  I grew up in New York City along with my two main heroes Superman and images of riding on a flying carpet.
After multiple years of school  I started a family and moved to sunny Florida.  Family and work grew and I was living the dream with a loving wife, two phenomenal kids and building a thriving dental practice.  I was running from home to the office and from stress to stress, trying to enjoy the cracks of happiness when they arrived.
My plan was to obtain as much enjoyment form those activities that seemed to bring happiness along with them.  But I knew somewhere deep down there was a better way.  The images of superman and the flying carpet still floated in my head.
So back to the song.  A street has two sides a glass of water a top and bottom.  We all know about the glass with water half way and whether it’s half filled or half empty.  Therefore the same fact can be seen in completely opposite viewpoints.  Is the same thing true with the sunny side of the street; is it open solely to interpretation or to your mood in the moment?

And if you are on the dark side of the street, the unhappy side, the question becomes what needs to be done to cross over to the sunny side?

 A puppy’s perspective

The answer to a few questions will start you on your happiness journey.
1: would you like to cross over to the sunny side?
2: are you willing to let go of whatever is keeping you prisoner on the darker side?
3: are you willing to practice being happy?
If so then continue and read on.
First imagine a walk to the middle of the street so that you can see both sides.  Give yourself the opportunity to contemplate that you could cross over but you may have some very good reasons and feel full justified in being unhappy and therefore stuck on the unhappy side. You believe that the circumstances of the moment have dropped you there.
The five major categories that can keep you prisoner are
1. wanting more of something that you do not have or wanting less of what you do have;
2. being angry about something and feeling justified about it;
3. feeling restless and antsy;
4. feeling bored; and
5. doubting that you can change your view.
Once you have moved to the middle of the street and have identified which category is holding you prisoner just relax and take a breath or two.  Explore your body and relax some more.  For a moment let whatever you feel to be there without trying to change anything.
Next, recall the practice of building your “happiness well” (described below). Hold the thought and feelings of your happiness well in mind along with the thoughts and feelings of being in prison.  Try to equally balance the intensity of both sides; the happiness well and the prisoner.  Hold both in mind at the same time.
You can practice balancing two thoughts for this with a simple exercise.  Close your eyes and touch your right thumb and index finger together. Get a sense of what that feels like. Now release those fingers and touch your left thumb and index finger together.  Get a sense of how that feels.  Now feel both sides touching at the same time.  It may feel a bit like balancing when riding a bicycle.
It is interesting that you may find with this exercise that the circumstances do not change but your interpretation or need to hold on to the unhappiness dissolves away seemingly all by itself.

Actions                                                                  Austen boat
The happiness well is something you make yourself at home.  Take you favorite cup and place it in a safe place where you can see it and leave undisturbed for a week.  Take a piece of paper and a pen.  Cut strips of paper about one half inch wide and leave the paper and the pen next to the cup.  Each day for a week write down one of the happy moments of the day and place that paper into the cup.
At the end of the week you have a cup filled with happiness.  Most of the memories will have faded but you can read through them and let the happiness soak back in. As you happiness well gets deeper and happier it will be easy to recall and balance against the unhappy side.  Feel free to add more happiness to you well.

This may be the answer to the ageold question of, “Why did the chicken cross the road?”  Now you know it was to get to the sunny side of the street.  So cross over don’t be chicken.  And remember when you eat breakfast the happiest eggs you can eat are sunny side up.



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