Secrets For A Happier Life April 5, 2012


Secrets For A Happier Life: Ideas, Inspiration & Practices


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Stretching into now for happiness




Michael D Selzer DDS


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This moment this breath April 5, 2012

Dear Michael,   



Although I have lived for many years in ice free sunny south Florida I vividly remember the crispy cold fresh air and skating on a frozen lake in my hometown of New York. Along with that were theIce groupwarnings and the stories I heard about going out on ice that was too thin.


Even now if I walk out on a frozen lake were others are already skating or ice fishing I am still fearful of thin ice and possibly falling into the freezing cold water. Wouldn’t it be nice to thicken the ice?


I invite you to continue reading and allow your ice to thicken.


Michael Selzer DDS  

Quick Changes
What does it feel like to walk out on the ice? Whatice skaterthoughts come into your mind? What is the response that your body and mind has to those feelings and thoughts? Would you be the first person to walk out on the ice or would you wait for others to show that it may be safe?


Even back in ice free sunny Florida there are still plenty of “thin ice” moments. Being caught in traffic on the way to the airport. Poor service in a restaurant. Getting caught in the rain. Certainly the outcome is not potentially as serious as falling through the ice but still the body’s and mind’s response is similar. Like thickening the ice wouldn’t it be nice to thicken your comfort zone, your level of happiness?


Stretching may be one of the answers to both the ice and the remainder of life.



Over thin ice if you lie down all stretched out and slowly slither along the ice your weight can more easily be supported by a larger area of ice.  As on the ice if you panic and try to run you will surely get wet.


What we experience is made up of two parts. One is the reality of what is happening and the other is our psychological habituated reaction to it. The reality is what it is but our reaction to it makes up a large portion of what we consider our experience. When you were a kid it may have been fun to jump in puddles of water and get yourself or others all wet.  Now you probably avoid stepping in puddles just to keep your shoes clean and dry.  It’s all in our reactions to our experiences.


The good news is that we can change our reaction and become happier with more and more of life. Or for some less unhappy with more and more of life.


Responses to life can be stretched out by examining what is actually happening right now rather than trying to either push it away or grab more if it. If concern or fear or annoyance comes up (and you would prefer to return to solid ice or happiness) try stretching out into a fuller experience of the moment.


Small Moments Of Happiness
First breathe in and notice that you are aware of breathing in. On the next breath notice the rising and falling of your chest or abdomen. After a few breaths while maintaining some attention to your breathing notice and listen to the sounds that are around you.


Awareness of the breath and sound has stretched the moment and created a bigger space for you to merge and respond with whatever your experience had been. You still may not like it but it is not as bitter.


Next, where are you? Geographically and locally? Imagine looking down from a low flying helicopter. In your mind name the following: country, state, city, community, building and room or outside in the fresh air? What is the temperature, the humidity, the lighting?


All of these additions to your awareness of thisice mothermoment thickens the ice and gives you much more support and foundation. If you knew the ice were two feet thick you would have the confidence to jump up and down on it or even drive a car over it.


Thickening your awareness of this moment thickens your ability to be sure footed and it lessens those nagging fears or concerns about the way things will turn out. It eases your flowing into happiness.

Golf Secrets:  A golfer’s perspective for living in the moment
Stretching into the moment for golf may be just the answer.  Divide the swing into three parts.  First recall a time when you felt really confident as you were standing over the ball and that confidence was with you right through the swing.  And you saw the ball go just where you knew it would. Stretch your mind into the confidence that memory.
Second pick your target for this swing.  Stretch your visualization of seeing the ball go there.
Third drop all thoughts about the swing and target and just swing. Stretch into the swing and only the swing.   Allow your body to swing without any thought of control or outcome. 
Just think, this moment this swing, and enjoy the happiness of the moment.  Remember the fun part of playing golf is in the swing.

Happiness:  A puppy’s perspective for living in the moment
Austen stretching


A moment of Austen

exploring a

natural instinctive stretch.

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