Secrets For A Happier Life 8-5-2010

Secrets For A Happier Life: Ideas, Inspiration & Practices

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“It may not be easy to find happiness in ourselves, but it is not possible to find it elsewhere.”

Agnes Repplier


Happiness comes in drops
Thought matches body sensations

Trigger zone for happiness

You can have happiness now

Happiness & Sunshine 24×7

A book I have enjoyed
The Zen Of Alice


Daniel Silberberg

On The Road To Happiness Aigust 5, 2010
Dear Michael,

Welcome back to Secrets For A Happier Life.

Imagine a sailboat on a lake with the wind swirling and shifting from one direction to another, as it sweeps in over and around the mountain.  In your mind allow this sailboat to have lost both its centerboard for stability and its rudder for steering.
Auste And AlligatorWith no means to steady the sailboat or steer, the sail boat would be pushed by the whim of the wind in any and all directions.  Every time the wind shifted the sailboat would be thrown off to another track.  In a similar manner our reactions to routine events can toss our thoughts and emotions around and before we know it we have lost our connection to happiness.
I invite you to continue reading below.
Yours truly,
Michael Selzer DDS

Small Moments Of Happiness

Like the sailboat we need both a centerboard and a rudder to continue to go where and how we choose.  For us, the stability of the centerboard can be having the awareness of our current state of mind:   ie. what and how are we feeling, right now?  or stopping for a moment to take inventory of what we are feeling.  And for the rudder it can be choosing to nudge the mind and thoughts in the direction we choose with a method I will call self guided potential (SGP).
Imagine you are sitting at a traffic light humming along with the music and bang!,  you are startled by a car that lightly rolls into you.  You check and there is no damage.  As you get back in your car your mind has already started to replay the incident and goes off in multiple directions.
One thought leads to another and before you realize it you are miles down the road and find yourself thinking about some childhood trauma.  Where did the humming and happiness go and how do you get back to it?  You can use your centerboard and steering, your self guided potential.

Quick Changes

Your centerboard is to take a moment and see what is actually happening within yourself in this moment.  You have to know where you are in order to get to where you want to go.  It’s like a gps system in your car.  You need to start where you are, right now.
For your centerboard:
Step 1 – Take a slow breath, the deeper the better.
Step 2 – Find something within your body or mind to soften or relax just a little, to take the edge off.
Step 3 – Just notice without changing anything else what you are now thinking and feeling.
Step 4 – Note a body sensation and just let it be, let it simmer a bit.
Step 5 – Note that this is where you are, your centerboard, your starting place.
Steering back to your path following your SGP

(self guided potential)

Step 1 – Smile; decide if you want to stay where you are or return to a happier state.  Happier state?  Good.
Step 2 – Start with a word the describes exactly what you are feeling right now.  Okay, now find a word to describe a similar feeling but a little lighter, with less intensity and also find a word with a little more intensity.  For example if it was a surprise bump to your car you might end up feeling angry.  A word with less intensity might be annoyed and one with more might be furious.
Step 3 – See if you can shift to the lighter word and let that sit for a minute.  Then if you like choose a word that is lighter or less intense than that one and shift to that word.  Your feelings will shift along with the focus on each word.
Step 4 – You are back on the road toward happiness.
Step 5 – Practice this with little things so that when the big things come up you are ready.

Happiness: A puppy’s perspective for living in the moment

It’s all little things. Austen at table

Golf Secrets:  A golfer’s perspective for living in the moment
For a change during practice focus     Auste And Alligator mainly on the intuitive mind and drop

throughts from the thinking mind and critical mind.
As you swing place attention on the sound of the club striking the ball and practice listening for a crisp report.

Thoughts From Our Readers

“I am a seed in the field of life enjoying the gentle breeze waiting for the rain and sun so I can sprout. ”      from    James D’Arezzo Jr.
“Why is life great ?   (that’s a better greeting than, “How is life”)
Answer:   Because it is a choice.     from  Les Bolland

Upcoming topics in future newsletters

*Revealing the happiness within ordinary moments

*Finding the flow and going with it

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