Secrets for Happier Life 4-22-2010

Secrets For A Happier Life: Ideas, Inspiration & Practices
Quick Links



I would love to hear from you 
Share your happiness tips and see them in a future newsletter

Email Link         





Join Our Mailing  List
Spread The Word
Want to live around happier family and friends?

  Forward to a Friend
Smile of the Week 




“Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory”

 Albert Schweitzer
Be Happy Now April 22, 2010
Dear Michael,   


Welcome to Secrets For A Happier Life. 
Like rain dripping into and filling a bucket, your life can become happier one drop at a time. For over 25 years I have gathered thoughts and experimented with practices related to increasing joy.  I am happy to share them with you. 
Yogi Berra is reported to have said, “It’s like deja vu, all over again.”  Was he talking about our lives and how we  seem to be on a merry-go-round bumping into the same problems over and over again?  What does it take to step off into a new direction?   If he were asked how many psychologists it takes to change a light bulb Yogi might have answered, “only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change.”  Are you ready?  How is your light? Your happiness?
Right now what can you do to add another drop of happiness to your life?  Remember, happiness is a road you travel along, not a destination.  I invite you to begin with Small Moments of Happiness and Quick Changes below. 
Yours truly,  
Michael Selzer DDS


Small Moments Of Happiness

Notice that when you laugh you are happy. Notice especially that when you are laughing your whole body is moving. It’s in motion. You have stopped thinking, have let go and relaxed and allowed your body to move and shake. You are happy for at least that moment. And then like the ripples settling down in a pond the waves and motions of laughter settle back to our routine level of being.

The trick to being happy is to have more small moments of happiness and then let the natural brain chemistry learn to stimulate this happy response more and more often.


Quick Changes

Right now recall a moment when you were happy. Expand the image of that or the sense of that moment of happiness. Make it big and bigger in your minds eye. Put it on a TV screen, a movie screen, an I-max screen.

Group  SmilesOr, you can also pretend. That’s right, merely make up a good thought. It works just as well. The brain does not differentiate between real and pretend. It just registers a path for each thought. As you have more happy thoughts the path gets deeper and easier to access and reverberate with other thoughts. That’s it. Hold onto the awareness of happiness and let it soak into your body down into your finger tips and toes. 


The trick is to continually just let go of unwanted thoughts and replace them with happier ones. Gradually the groove of happy thoughts becomes the routine.


Do this practice 3 to 6 times a day or whenever you realize that you are not as happy as you would chose to be. Allow the groove of happiness in the brain’s chemistry to get deeper and deeper.  

Happiness: A Puppy’s Perspective

Or just take a puppy to the beach
Austen Eating Sand
1. More drops fill your bucket faster.  Every hour think ten happy thoughts.  They can be real or pretend.  The groove in the brain will get deeper either way.  For those old enough to remember that may be where, “it’s groovy” comes from.
2. When an unhappy thought comes up, immediately think the opposite.  Turn it into an opportunity to experience a happy thought when you most need it.  Again, its okay to pretend.
3. Before you fall asleep at night review happy thoughts.  Form an intention to continue filling your bucket with happy thoughts tomorrow.  As you sleep the brain continues to process the last conscious thoughts you have.


Upcoming topics in future newsletters

*More on how to train your brain
*How awareness to body sensations deepens happiness
*How to enhance the good moments of each day



Choose Bliss 7-15-21

SECRETS FOR A HAPPIER LIFEInspiration and Practices
Choose Bliss

Beyond inside and outsideBeyond words and images
Beyond the beyond of thought, dreams and deep sleepLies where we are right nowJust as we all are
Although a clay pot is made of clayThere is no contact between the clay and the pot
Returning from the beyond of the nondualSojourn in the frequency of blissChannel chaos into streams of blissAnd follow its windingsBack into the field of I
Choose Bliss
Archive of NewslettersSpiritual Gravity
Michael Selzer DDS (retired)Happiness CoachingCharlottesville,

Entering The Gap 6-20-21

SECRETS FOR A HAPPIER LIFEInspiration and Practices

Inspiration and Practices

Entering the Gap

Although thoughts may seem to flow uninterrupted from one to the other there is usually a small gap in between them. When you are in the “Gap” you are flowing within time and everything else stands still. Your Gap might be imagined as nirvana, happiness, God, being or envisioning your highest wish. 
I invite you to read on and hopefully finding your way into your own felt sense of the Gap.

Almost continually we are receiving information from our five sense windows and thoughts. I will focus on sights, sounds and thoughts as they are the most prominent. Whenever we become aware of something (some + thing), a sight, sound or thought, there is an almost immediate shift into an instantaneous evaluation of liking or disliking whatever it is. Often we spend more time thinking about our liking or disliking and our comparison of this “thing” or experience rather then about the thing itself. We get to ride along a wave of emotion and then the next thing comes along; unless we have become attached or stuck to the current thought. Check in with yourself as to your internal evaluation of these words, right now. Getting stuck eliminates the gap because we just ruminate and recycle the same thought round and round sometimes building up into an action that we might later have preferred not to have done. 

Remember the gap

Recently I have been practicing with the two thoughts of:
Let go and embrace.

Whatever the thought or experience is, as soon as you become aware of thinking about it or evaluating it just “Let go.”
If the thought sticks around then I practice embracing it. For me embracing the thought is to ride the wave of the emotion that has been raised. Once the wave has crested and settles I find that I can then let go of it.

As I watch for thoughts and emotions to arise and fall on there own I help then along by repeating to myself, “let go.” Then whatever the next sight, sound or thought that comes into awareness I repeat to myself, “let go.” 

Gradually I start to see the gap, the small quiet space in between thoughts. I start to feel the calm, stillness and enjoyment and then WAP its gone as quickly as it had arrived. So I go back to letting go and embracing. Sometimes when I become really quiet and still the old thoughts drop away and new connections and insights appear. 

Often I can sit and watch the trees swaying in the wind that I cannot see. 

I sit and wonder why is that?


Archive of Newsletters

Spiritual Gravity

Michael Selzer DDS (retired)
Happiness Coaching
Charlottesville, Virginia